The 'FuckIt' List
Ever since my diagnosis of having an inoperable brain tumour, I have had a 'Bucket List'. I hate the name 'bucket list'. So instead, I changed it to a more appropriate name, which I now call my 'FuckIt List'.
It´s a list where I can put all those things that once may have been on my 'bucket list' – but I've now realised that I am too old (grown-up), too tired and simply too “different” compared to the last time I put things to do on my list.
So here is my ever changing, ever growing 'FuckIt List' for you all to get some ideas from. We aren't supposed to tick every one off the list. But, its something we can set a goal for and if we manage to tick just one, we're doing alright!
 Own A Holiday HomeI attempted this once before and had a turn for the worst so I ended up selling it back after 6 weeks. The idea was to use it as a holiday home for my self and my family whilst offering it to families who have suffered a brain tumour. I STILL want to do this and One day I WILL. |  Dance on TikTokI need to get my balance back. Let's face it, its been well over 10 year since I learned to walk again. How? Through pure perseverance and determination. I went to the gym 3 days a week for 5 hours a day concentrating on balance and co-ordination exercises that were given to me by my trainer. I did it before... So I can do it again. This is on my #FuckItList because I want to be able to dance on TikTok without falling over. I loved to dance. I love music and I admit I love TikTok too. |  Duet For HopeOne of my biggest fears was to sing online. But I tried it. No matter how bad I sounded and even though I couldn't remember the words and got tongue tied... I did it! I'm hope it will encourage others to do the same no matter how good or bad they sound! There come a time in life, where you just have to say, FuckIT! You only get one life and you never know if and when that will end so make the most of it whilst you can. |
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 Backpack in ThailandWow I feel old now talking about this... Many moons ago before Ruby had entered my life and before I was diagnosed I lived the dream in Koh Samui, Thailand! It was supposed to have been a permanent move but it ended up being short lived and that is when my brain tumour came about. I haven't been back to explore the island yet. I really want to go back and see if I can explore any of the memories I once had and to show Ruby how her mummy once lived on a Backpacking Tour. |  Horse Riding on the BeachHaving grown up with horses as a child I have always wanted to trot and canter across the sandy beaches and never had the chance. My dream would be to take Ruby to the picturesque village of Woolacombe in Dorset and run parallel to the beach. Riding through fabulous scenery and undulating sand dunes and bridle ways. Who wouldn't want to do this? |  Dine in the Ponsbourne PodsJust minutes away from us in the heart of Hertfordshire are the Ponsbourne Pods! Where you can enjoy the stunning views whilst eating a scrumptious Indian meal finished with heavenly cocktails. Ruby and I have seen these many times and always wanted to visit. I’ve heard now you can stay overnight too. Just something else that I’ve added to my ‘FuckIt List’ to do… |
 Visit to Windsor CastleOne of the UK’s top attractions just outside my home in Hertfordshire, it’s easy to see why Windsor Castle would be on my ‘FuckIt List’. Open to visitors most of the year and you can tour open areas too. (St George’s Chapel, the State Apartments, the Semi-State Rooms and The Middle Ward and Round Tower) It’s also home to The Queen, so I’ll be sure to give her a wave if she’s home! |  Take the Unseen Tour of Camden TownOne of the more off the beaten path things to do in London is to take a tour by (formerly homeless) Unseen Tours. One of the highlights of the trip for me would be the climb to the top of Primrose Hill overlooking London. I was born in Camden and don’t remember a lot about it so for me it would be a reminder of my old life and something I can share with Ruby. |  Go Up on the London EyeIt’s a very touristy thing, but if I only do one mainstream thing in London, I need to make it the London Eye. It takes half an hour for your pod to travel the full length of the wheel, and the views of the capital sprawling out beneath you are absolutely unimaginable. |
 Take Ruby to Longleat Safari ParkLongleat is a stately home that sits on 900 acres of grounds. It’s home to the UK’s number one safari park so it’s great for family day out. There are various attractions that’ll keep everyone entertained, including: Jungle Kingdom and Animal Adventures and you even have the chance to get up close and personal with a variety of different animals. I went here as a kid with my uncle and remember one of the lions jumping onto of his van. I would love for Ruby to experience this too. |  Stay in a Beach Hut in WhitstableWhitstable is in the beautiful seaside town of Kent, renowned for its fresh seafood and annual oyster festival. With pastel-coloured shop fronts and a thriving arts scene, it is a postcard-perfect English town. Whitstable is famous for its colourful beach huts which line the coast, they are a must-see feature and they even have huts you can stay in! It is the perfect escape from home and a chance to soak up some fresh sea air too. |  Wild Camping in the Scottish HighlandsI’ve only ever visited Scotland once and that was literally a passing through. I’ve heard that you can go wild camping in the Scottish Highlands which would be the best way to discover the breathtaking landscapes of Scotland. An opportunity to get off the beaten track and get away from the crowds. We may have to sacrifice some modern conveniences and put up with a bit of unpredictable weather – but the rewards would be well worth it! |
 Visit the Eden ProjectLocated in a crater the size of 30 football pitches in Cornwall, the Eden Project is an educational charity that aims of working towards a better, greener future. It hosts an array of tropical biomes that house beautiful gardens. With tropical plants and waterfalls of the Rainforest Biome or you can explore the lemon trees and olive groves of the Mediterranean Biome. The Eden Project is great for a family day out and I know Ruby would love it! |  Explore the Jurassic CoastThe Jurassic Coast stretches for 95 miles between Exmouth and Dorset. It’s famous for its rocks, fossils and landforms and has millions of years of geological history! I just want to take in all the stunning scenery and explore the dramatic coastline with it’s white cliffs and spectacular castles. I can even take Ruby fossil hunting, pay a trip to a museum and visit all the seaside towns along the route. I feel a road trip coming on… |  Attend Glastonbury FestivalGlastonbury festival is a world-famous music festival in Somerset. It goes on for five-days accommodates around 200,000 people. I have always wanted to go but never have, so at some point I would like to go with Ruby and our wellies and dance the weekend away in the rain like everybody else! |
 Visit the Isles of ScillyOff the coast of Cornwall, the Isles of Scilly look like a truly magical place to visit. There are five inhabited islands with a very small population, meaning it is largely uncrowded and untouched. There are extensive coastal paths and natural trails which make for beautiful walks. The Isles of Scilly could almost be considered the UK’s equivalent of the Caribbean with its white sandy beaches and bright blue ocean. It is natural beauty at its best. Why wouldn’t I add this to my FuckIt List? |  Soak in the Thermal Waters in BathI spent my childhood growing up in the beautiful Georgian city of Bath which is famous for its natural thermal springs. Rich in minerals, particularly sulphate, calcium & chloride, the waters are known for their healing qualities. It’s for this reason that the thermal springs are seen as a centre for wellbeing and relaxation. I’ve visited the Roman Baths for a more historical experience however never visited the Thermae Bath Spa, which includes a rooftop pool with beautiful views over the city! |  Paddle Board in NewquayNewquay is the UK’s surf capital! Having gained a world-renowned reputation for its excellent surfing. Home to beautiful beaches, Newquay is a popular surfing destination for beginners and seasoned pros alike. Some of the best surfing spots. Now I know I can’t surf, what with my balance, but I have learnt how to paddle board! Albeit on my arse! Just being able to paddle board is as relaxing or as adrenaline fuelled as you like, but one thing remains the same; it's always fun! |
 Visit the Magical Fairy Pools in Isle of SkyeLocated at Glenbrittle on Isle of Skye in Scotland, these natural rock pools are famous for their crystal clear spring water. The magical turquoise blue of the waters – fed from a series of waterfalls – are an unusual sight in the UK. For those that are feeling brave, you can swim in the enchanting rock pools. But it’s only recommended for the most adventurous of swimmers, as the water is icy cold. If my face didn’t go off all the time I would so be up for this! I’ll just observe instead. |  Watch the Changing of Guards at Buckingham PalaceMy step mum used to read me a poem by Alan Alexander Milne: They're changing guard at Buckingham Palace - Christopher Robin went down with Alice. Alice is marrying one of the guard. "A soldier's life is terrible hard," Says Alice. Now I read this to Ruby. I’ve always longed to see the changing of guard and as it’s free to watch won’t need a ticket to attend and Ruby would love it. I just need to make sure we don’t get in the way of the Guards as they march what with my balance! |  Visit the Sacred Monkey Forest Sanctuary in BaliUbud is a tiny village located in the middle of Bali. It's supposed to be one of the most beautiful places to see when you visit. Countryside, the landscape , the strong culture, the artistic things, the temples and the real local life activities in Bali such as seeing the monkeys all around. Bali is somewhere I've always wanted to explore and what better than to it then by visiting on someone's recommendation to see the sacred Monkey Forest Sanctuary! |
 Visit the Harry Potter Studio with RubyI am a massive kid at heart and I can’t wait to take Ruby on a magical day out at the Warner Bros Studio Tour, into the Wizarding World of Harry Potter and learn how the film was made. Ruby and I can explore the sets and find out how they made the magic come to life. She’s always wanted to wizard herself up! A must do on my ‘FuckIt’ list and one to do with the whole family too. |  Go On the Fastest Zip Line in the World - WalesAn absolute ‘FuckIt List’ must for me (adrenaline junky). Wales is home to the world’s fastest zipline, shooting you through the air at up to 100mph. It’s about as close as you’ll get to flying and you can also take in spectacular views over the mountains of Wales. Perhaps not one for the faint-hearted, but you surely can’t beat the exhilarating thrill of whizzing over the land. An unmissable ‘FuckIt List’ activity and a must do with Ruby once she's old enough! |  Own a Holiday Home in DorsetDorset’s incredible coastline and traditional countryside charm make it the perfect place for my family to own a holiday home. I’ve always wanted to own my own holiday home and this will give us (as a family) the freedom to come and go as we please allowing us to spend quality time together at our very own little retreat. Since a little girl I have been in awe of Dorset’s incredible landscapes. I plan to use my holiday home also as a retreat for other brain tumour sufferers and their family. |
 Trip to the CotswoldsWith landscapes that will take our breath away, look no further than the rolling countryside and honey-coloured towns of the Cotswolds. Its status as an Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty tells me all I need to know. The Cotswolds is one of my top UK ‘FuckIt List’ items because it is exceptionally pretty. There is nowhere quite like it. Towns and villages of the Cotswolds ooze with fairytale charm and enchanting tranquility that Ruby will love. |  High Tea at the RitzWhat better place to start ticking off the ‘FuckIt’ List than with a classic British tradition: afternoon tea at the Ritz. A real ‘FuckIt List’ addition, high tea at at a famous London location. |  Go punting in CambridgeAnother activity that is unique to the UK is punting. A punt is a flat-bottomed boat that is moved along by pushing off the river bed with a long pole. One of the original and most popular punting locations is in Cambridge, along the River Cam. A perfect activity for the summer months and there’s no better way to spend a sunny afternoon with the family than floating down the river in a city as beautiful as Cambridge. |